January 2009
137 posts
A friend recently texted me "wut r u gonna do 4...
What is the critical age you must reach before you...
I think socks and ink pens mysteriously disappear into an alternate dimension, and somewhere in time, another race is faced with the dilemma of randomly appearing socks and pens. “Damn it, every time I reach into my couch I pull out another sock… that’s the 11th one this week..” “yeah, so?” “Motherfucker, I don’t even own socks.. I got no damn...
The sex offender registry is like a directory for...
The Boy and his Pig and the Crack.
Raej62491: write a story
Raej62491: now go
TtotheNtotheC03: about what?
Raej62491: a boy
TtotheNtotheC03: and
Raej62491: a pig
TtotheNtotheC03: and
Raej62491: a crack in the sidewalk in china by the bookstore
TtotheNtotheC03: the bookstore? there's only one in china?
Raej62491: well only one that involves the boy and the pig and the sidewalk crack
TtotheNtotheC03: okay
TtotheNtotheC03: once upon a time, there was a boy in china. He was walking a pig down the sidewalk near a bookstore. He looked down and saw a crack. An old man sitting at a small table noticed the boy. He looked over at the boy, inhaled a ball of smoke from his pipe, then got up from his chair and walked over to the boy. He pointed to the crack. The boy looked at him confusedly.
"That crack represents your understanding of the world" says the old man.
TtotheNtotheC03: the boy was still confused
TtotheNtotheC03: "you see. you step across the crack with ease, but the ants, they cannot cross. if you have a small mind, you will never bridge the gap and fully understand what it is like on the other side. You shall forever remain like the ant."
TtotheNtotheC03: the pig oinked in agreement.
TtotheNtotheC03: the end
When people ask me how I got a bum leg, I say...
A short story
I was walking through the park, and I saw this squirrel. I was like “hey you squirrel.” He looked up and me, and he was like “…………” -fin- Did you really expect him to say something? It’s a damn squirrel!
Breathe Owl Breathe- Toboggan 01/29 7:00 at...
I just woke up from a nap
and had one of those panic moments- when you think it’s really tomorrow morning and you’ve slept through something important.
Hey, if you're homeless, why wouldn't you just...
I sit at work every day, bored out of my mind, scouring the internet, watching the time crawl by ever so slowly. Mostly, reading articles and stories, watching videos, and listening to music: new, old, current, whatever strikes my fancy. I watch tumblr intently, like a lonely puppy at home in the window: waiting; watching; getting restless at times; hoping that something, anything, pops up to keep...
radiohead- exit music (for a film)
This is my...
EVERYTIME
natalieloren:
I post something to do with willmccloud, I get a new follower. I’m only popular by this association.
HA, I think you’re talking about me. It’s like a good song. Who cares whether you stumbled upon it yourself, or a friend told you about it, it’s still just as good.
I've done a lot of thinking, and I've come to the...
Sometimes I'll try jumping really hard to grab...
Elton John- Can You Feel the Love Tonight? I...
Who remembers the Pizza Hut “Book-It” program? That was the best.
The Bicycle Thief- Boy At A Bus Stop
You Come and...
Despite your imperfections, you're perfect.
...
Oh, that’s brilliant! Your idea requires so much less time, effort, and money than mine. However, my level of coordination may not be adequate for that method. I think that the moment I closed my eyes, I would fall backwards out of the swing and most-likely break my neck or land on a small child.
chelseakim:
what about when you’re swinging on the playground? the back swing you can close...
Upon seeing someone carrying a large stack of...
is it normal to have a sudden urge to violently knock everything out of their arms and casually walk away?
Why I hate my current living situation:
1.) Immature alcoholic room mates- Don’t get me wrong, I love an alcoholic as much as the next guy, but it’s ones who still act like they’re sixteen that I can’t stand. I live with two of them. For example: I walk through the door on friday just past 1pm, and proceed to the kitchen, littered with empty beer bottles, where the two of them are doing shots of vodka. I reach in...
Today on AIM,
someone by the name of DisappointedCoho sent me the following message:
“I AM A FUNCTOR FROM THE PAIN CATEGORY TO THE CATEGORY OF YOUR FACE, ASSHOLE.”
lol, I don’t know who you are, but you just became my new best friend.
My dreams have been musicals for three nights in a...
sigur rós- hafsól
This is my first in a series of...
Suits?
I’ve always found it rather peculiar and malapropos that U.S. Secret Service agents wear slick dress shoes, suits, and full-length overcoats, rather than a lightweight running shoe and maybe sweat pants or a vinyl jogging suit: you know, something that might afford them a little more speed and dexterity. Did I mention comfort? If I am ever in a position in which I must entrust my life to the...
Buddha says satisfaction is the death of desire....
Do you ever
have one of those crazy nude dreams - you know, the one where you are standing in front of the entire class naked - then you wake up, only to find that you are indeed standing in front of the entire class naked?
I'm spending a season in hell to reignite my...
What a sorrowful realization: that the...
Did you know?
One day on the International Space Station is only 90 minutes long?
There's nothing that chills my bones more than the...
Hey, I’m finally using my Twitter. Email me your link or add me so I don’t look so pathetic.
uh oh....
amyindurham:
getting braces tomorrow. feeling nervous. but mostly like i’m too old for this 12-year-old-esque ritual. and hoping no one laughs. (hello, insecurity!)
Hey! Come aboard my fine ship! I’ve been looking for a first mate on the S.S. Silver Tooth since december haha.
Happy 200th Birthday Edgar Allan Poe.
who remembers this from childhood? →
(via chelseakim)
I completely forgot about this and it was such a huge part of my life! We sat in a circle and counted feet though.